Hira Nathan: “Often, the most growth or healing can be found in those small moments. I’ve also noticed that the things that steal my sleep are usually not the big things — they’re just lots of little things.” (Photo supplied)
In the first of an occasional series on finding wellness in mātauranga Māori, Hira Nathan shares the small habits that create calm in his life.
I don’t remember much about the day my dad died. I think it rained, but I’m not sure if that’s just how my memory has decided to hold onto that day.
I remember everything felt really slow. I went to the hospital and cried, then I started calling everyone, organising the undertaker, sorting out where we were going to meet, the cups of tea, the biscuits, all that logistics stuff.
Both my parents are mahi people. I grew up near our marae, Kahuranaki, and whenever we went to hui there, we’d go straight to the back and grab a tea towel or a shovel or a knife.
When life gets busy or things get tough, mahi is my go-to. I get busy, I push harder, I keep moving. I write lists, sacrifice sleep, and tough it out. Resilience is in my DNA.
Over the last few years, I’ve tried to pause more. Rather than jump straight into the next job, I’ve tried to be more intentional, to listen to my hinengaro, and be present.
I’ve used lots of different techniques to do this, and now I regularly flick between a few of them throughout the day. Things like leaving my phone in the car, single-tasking, making sure I finish work by 5pm, exercising every day even if it’s just for 20 minutes, and doing breath work and meditation.
I’ve found that lots of simple tools add up to big changes. Just stopping for a bit, taking a breath and noticing the noises around me. Repeating the words “stay present” when my mind wanders off. A short walk in the middle of a difficult day. Or quick meditations.
I’ve noticed that often the most growth or healing can be found in those small moments. I’ve also noticed that the things that steal my sleep are usually not the big things — they’re just lots of little things.
When I sat down to write about this kaupapa, a whakataukī kept coming to me, and I wasn’t sure why.
Whāia te iti kahurangi, ki te tuohu koe, me he maunga teitei.
Seek the treasure you value most dearly; if you bow your head, let it be to a lofty mountain.
Then it came to me. As much as the whakataukī is about resilience and working hard, it also speaks of perspective. The storms of everyday life — deadlines, bills, arguments, mahi, chores and all those sorts of things — can feel huge. But if we take a moment to breathe and reflect, we realise they aren’t maunga teitei. They’re just small bumps in the road that we need to navigate.
Sometimes all it takes is one conscious inhale and exhale. A slow karakia under your breath. A moment of stillness on the deck with a cup of tea. Listening to the manu. Taking a nap. Small recalibrations that give us the space we need to make better decisions. They remind us of who we are and where we stand.
Our tūpuna navigated vast oceans with no modern instruments, guided by the stars, the winds, the currents. That knowledge required stillness, deep observation, and trust in rhythms bigger than themselves. If they could find calm in the uncertainty of the Pacific, surely, we can find it in the uncertainty of our inboxes and calendars.
Wero o te wiki
Here’s a little wero or challenge for your week. Before you leave the house in the morning, place your feet firmly on the whenua, take a big breath in, hold it for a few seconds, and then do the biggest sigh you can. Then do it again. With each breath, let go of some of the little worries you have, and then leave the house with a clear mind.
It’s easy and it’s intentional. Try to make it a regular thing. It’s nothing fancy, nothing new, but it might be exactly what your tinana, hinengaro, and wairua are asking for.
Hira Nathan (Ngāti Kahungunu, Ngāti Tuwharetoa, Ngāpuhi) was born and raised in Hawke’s Bay. He is an electrician by trade, now based in Tāmaki Makaurau. Hira has always had a passion for writing, and over the years, he has written for a number of publications. He is a lifelong practitioner of mindfulness and is the best-selling author of Whakawhetai and Piki Te Ora, published by Allen and Unwin.
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